When do you actually get married?

Sometime back I was checking marriage stuff over the net and I bumped into a story by Dr. Phil where he says, he got married four years after he had said “I do”. That is when it hit him that He was actually married to the love of his life and needed to get serious about marriage.

I reserve my comments on that, but I guess we all need to be sure about marriage, leave alone the wedding , those are just celebrations, but the commitment to be married to someone. The covenant relationship that we engage in and we need to know that this is not rehearsal, it is here to stay, and till death do us part.

Good enough, Chris and I had gone out for many years and by the time we were getting married, I was marrying my best friend. This to me really helped me a lot and that has kept us going. But as a beginning to this blog and I would like to share my few shockers that I had to deal with after I said “I do”.

• I had to wake up and make breakfast (this was an expectation from Chris) – No way! This was hard. In my former life, breakfast was yours’ for the grab, you wake up anytime you want and sort yourself out.

• To figure out what we are having for dinner- in my former life I used to buy fries on my way home if I knew that there was nothing at home to eat. Many times when got home (now Chris house), there were no onions and Chris would humbly say – Honey, please start owning this home, start thinking of what we need to be eating. But trust you me, we ate those fries a few times.

• To be honest, I missed home. I cried a few months; I cried miserably, Chris used to get shocked at my behavior, I demanded to go visit my family two weeks after the wedding, I missed my brother and my sister. I felt so lonely yet I was married. He was so sweet to allow me to go home and say hi.

Lesson number one

The first lesson I learnt when I got married is that, you can’t just say” I do” and imagine your have began your life on a new clean slate. A day before you were a sister, a daughter and one day after you have a new title wife!

Take it easy on yourself-the cleaving takes place one day at a time. You slowly detach from your former life and embrace the new life. As you do so, you also embrace oneness as a couple.

Will be sharing lesson two soon.

Let us wait for the version according to Christopher – my lovely hubby!